When you’re young you know everything, and life seems so simple. Then a few shades of grey creep in, and before you know it, even the obvious stuff has a flipside.
Some examples that have happened to me recently:
1 – What are your kids doing?
I used to think “How could those irresponsible parents have been letting their wayward children run riot and steal/vandalise/whatever. That parents are clearly to blame!”. Until my kids reached teenageness, when of course you have to trust them, and they go to see their friends or go out shopping with friends, and you actually have no idea where they really are. Not quite as clear cut as I thought!
2 – Should the church allow gay marriage?
I’m totally 100% in favour of a person’s right to be gay, whether they were made like that from birth, or whether it’s a choice. The church is bigoted, discriminatory, and old fashioned, at least that what I thought until last week, when it dawned on me that the church has a right to be those things, hasn’t it? If an old fashioned club doesn’t want someone to join, what gives a person the right to force that club to let them join? In fact why would that person WANT to join that club? Let’s ignore that club, move on, and leave them behind. Forcing an unpleasant club to change seems just as unpleasant. Hmm, tricky!
3 – I want my kids to get good grades at school
This seems obvious, but then, will good grades lead to a better paid job, and will the extra money make them happier? Will good grades lead to a more enjoyable job? They won’t do any HARM, but then, they will make you more likely to be tempted into the rat race. The links are really hard to prove, and I’m not convinced that anyone really knows the answers.
4 – Should Muslim women wear hijabs/burkas?
Surely having to cover themselves (whether it’s a scarf or a full body thing) is repression of women, right? The fact that they have no choice in the matter? But then I read something where a Muslim lady was saying that she likes to be covered – she can see out to the world from the safety of inside her burka. So now I’m thinking that it’s almost unfair that they get this option and we don’t – though I suppose I could wear one if I wanted. I still think that they should have the choice, but I can see that covering up is not all bad. Oh dear, is there no preconceived prejudice that I can fall back on??
Still, it’s fun to learn and change, and to think about things like this. By the way, I’m not asking for answers to any of the above, they are just examples, and they my own personal views and not views that I want to push onto you – I’m just saying that a lot of these issues aren’t black or white when you look into them.